Welcome to Post-weekend Poetry and the fortieth poem in this series. This week’s piece is by poet, short story author, scriptwriter and lyricist Ken Temple.
If I could gingerly pontificate,
About the cheezburger on your plate,
I would give you a few pearls of advice,
In exchange for your cutlet and cheese slice:
You don’t want to eat it, it’s bad for you. Yeees!
You will only feel guilty and not fit in that dress.
The burger has calories, too many for you.
Kitty must stop you from looking like Winnie the Pooh!
Come on, don’t be greedy and give us a bite.
My tummy is growling and your bum’s way too wide!
This greasy delicatessen will do you no good,
Just let Kitty help you choose healthier food!
The cutlet so yummy, the gravy so tasty,
You don’t want to rush it… Look, Kitty is waiting!
Hey, listen, a phone call, it must be a sign!
I’ll just ‘intervene’ here, while you’re on the line…
That was funny, thank you, Ken.
He also loves comics and good music, but then, he says, who doesn’t?
If you’d like to submit your poem (40 lines max) for consideration for Post-weekend Poetry take a look here.
The blog interviews will return as normal tomorrow with publishing house Apostrophe Books Managing Director Martyn Forrester – the five hundred and first of my blog interviews with novelists, poets, short story authors, bloggers, biographers, agents, publishers and more. A list of interviewees (blogged and scheduled) can be found here. If you like what you read, please do go and investigate further. And I enjoy hearing from readers of my blog; do either leave a comment on the relevant interview (the interviewees love to hear from you too!) and / or email me.
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Unfortunately, as I post an interview a day (amongst other things) I can’t review books but I have a feature called ‘Short Story Saturdays’ where I review stories of up to 2,500 words. Alternatively if you have a short story or self-contained novel extract / short chapter (ideally up to 1000 words) that you’d like critiqued and don’t mind me reading it / talking about and critiquing it (I send you the transcription afterwards so you can use the comments or ignore them) on my ‘Bailey’s Writing Tips’ podcast, then do email me. They are fortnightly episodes, usually released on Sundays, interweaving the recordings between the red pen sessions with the hints & tips episodes. I am now also looking for flash fiction (<1000 words) for Flash Fiction Fridays.