5PM Fiction 003: The big black one with the space in the back

5PM Fiction 003: The big black one with the space in the back

Welcome to the third in the new series: 5pm Fiction.

Late April 2011 I discovered http://StoryADay.org and the project that is to write 31 stories in 31 days. Anyone who knows me or follows this blog, knows how passionate I am about short stories so my clichéd eyes lit up at this new marvel. And just a few days later there I was, breathing life into new characters. This went on to become (with some editing of course) my 31-story collection eBook Story A Day May 2011.

I was nearing completion of the 2012 project when I decided that I didn’t want to stop at the end of May so 5PM Fiction was born. I put a load of prompts on the 5PM Fiction page and today’s prompt was a ‘mixed bag’ (two characters, an object, a location, a dilemma, a trait), and today’s were an undertaker, a school boy, a book, a bus, the bus has broken down and claustrophobia, so here is my 655-worder.

The big black one with the space in the back

I can’t breathe… I… can’t… breathe… Help.

I want to shout but I can’t speak. It’s too hot in here. I’m going to cook. Someone, please, look at me, see what’s happening. I try to cough out the words but all I do is cough.

Yes! He’s looking… I know him! He’s Mr Taylor from that funeral place on Rawlings Terrace. He’s measuring me up for a coffin, I can tell, it’s in his eyes.

“Hello, Billy.”

Cough. “Hello…” Breathe. “Mr Taylor.”

“You don’t look very well. Are you OK?”

I decide that nodding my head is the best thing to do.

He smiles and I think he really means it. He doesn’t seem disappointed at all that I’m alright. “What are you reading?”

I look down at my book, my dad’s dictionary, and blush. He doesn’t know I’ve got it and he doesn’t like me taking things without asking, so I turn it over so Mr Taylor can’t see the front.

“Just a school book,” I lie and he nods.

“Are you sure you’re OK?”

I nod again and add a smile this time.

“OK. Well… they’ll get the bus running in a minute. And if they don’t they’ll send another bus.”

Oh God. We’re going to have to wait? That could take hours.

Breathe. Mum tells me not to panic, that I should breathe. I’m trying, but all I do is gulp air like a goldfish and some of it goes down the wrong way so I cough again.

I want Mr Taylor to return to his seat but he doesn’t.

“Do you mind if I sit next to you, Billy?”

I shake my head. Mum says I shouldn’t talk to strangers but Dad knows him, pointed him out to me once, so he must be alright and there are lots of people around.

“It’ll be nice to have the company, if I’m honest,” he says to me. If he’s honest? Does that mean he’s not? If they do ‘get the bus running’, will he follow me if I get off alone? Will he…

“Makes me nervous,” he continues.

I don’t know what he’s got to be nervous about, unless he doesn’t travel on the bus very often. He’s not been on mine before. “Nervous? Why?”

“Can you keep a secret?”

I look at my dad’s dictionary and nod.

“I don’t like confined spaces,” he tells me.

I want to open my dictionary but don’t. “What’s confined?” I ask him.

“It’s being in a small space when you want to be in a big one.”

It’s nice to know he feels like I do so I grin like my dad does when my mum’s just kissed him. “But this is a bus, it’s big.”

“I know,” he says and laughs.

“And you’re not alone,” I add.

He nods. I feel a bit better but he doesn’t look so good now. I wait for him to carry on but he doesn’t. “Why did you get on the bus if you don’t like being here?” I know it’s a silly question because I did the same thing but I have to because Mum and Dad are working.

“My car’s being serviced.”

“The big black one with the space in the back for…”

He laughs again. “Yes, Billy, the hearse. I’m on my way to collect it now.”

I’m too young for a car but I know Mum and Dad love driving theirs. It must be horrible for him not to have one, especially one that’s so special.

The bus wobbles and someone behind me cheers. Mr Taylor looks happy too and makes me feel good.

“The garage is on the way to your house, Billy, I could give you a lift, save you being on this thing the whole journey.”

I’ve always wanted to travel in a hearse. Hearse. Confined. I’ve learned two new words today. I don’t think my dad will mind at all.

You can sign up to receive these blog posts daily or weekly so you don’t miss anything… and follow me on Twitter where each new posting is automatically announced. You can also read / download my eBooks and free eShorts at Smashwords, Sony Reader Store, Barnes & Noble, iTunes Bookstore, Kobo and Amazon, with more to follow. I have a new forum, friend me on Facebook, like me on Facebook, connect with me on LinkedIn, find me on Tumblr, complete my website’s Contact me page or plain and simple, email me.  I also now have a new blog creation service especially for, but not limited to, writers.

Unfortunately, as I post an interview a day (amongst other things) I can’t review books but I have a feature called ‘Short Story Saturdays’ where I review stories of up to 2,500 words. Alternatively if you have a short story or self-contained novel extract / short chapter (ideally up to 1000 words) that you’d like critiqued and don’t mind me reading it / talking about and critiquing it (I send you the transcription afterwards so you can use the comments or ignore them)  on my ‘Bailey’s Writing Tips’ podcast, then do email me. They are weekly episodes, usually released Monday mornings UK time, interweaving the recordings between the red pen sessions with the hints & tips episodes. I am now also looking for flash fiction (<1000 words) for Flash Fiction Fridays and poetry for Post-weekend Poetry.

 

Story A Day May 2012: May 27th – Not like they used to

Late April 2011 I discovered http://StoryADay.org and the project that is to write 31 stories in 31 days. Anyone who knows me or follows this blog, knows how passionate I am about short stories so my clichéd eyes lit up at this new marvel. And just a few days later there I was, breathing life into new characters. This went on to become (with some editing of course) my 31-story collection eBook Story A Day May 2011.

And here we are a year later doing it all over again. Today’s prompt was to write dialogue. Having written a few dialogue pieces this month, I should be practiced. So here is my 301-worder.

Not like they used to

“They don’t make them like they used to, Ted.”

“No, they don’t… what don’t they?”

“These glasses. They don’t sit right.”

“I thought they looked new. Take them back then, can’t you?”

“Suppose. And they’re fussy.”

“Fussy, Frank?”

“Fuzzy.”

“Oh. What, like you can’t see properly?”

“Not properly, no.”

“Then definitely take them back.”

“Vera’s going to town tomorrow so…”

“They shouldn’t have let you leave the shop if they weren’t right.”

“Felt OK then.”

“What made you go for pink?”

“Eh?”

“Your glasses, they’re pink.”

“Are they? They were brown at the shop.”

“Well, they’re pink now.”

“Faded too then.”

“I think they’ve given you the wrong ones. Take them off and see.”

“…Oh.”

“They’re not the ones you chose, are they?”

“No they’re not… they’re Vera’s.”

“Vera’s? Why are you wearing hers?”

“I don’t know.”

“Won’t she be missing them?”

“Probably not, they’re her readings.”

“Oh, right. Did you watch the game last night?”

“Did, Ted. Bit disappointing.”

“Bunch of girls, aren’t they. I used to play football, you know.”

“I do.”

“Teddenham Tigers.”

“And you were good.”

“Thank you, Frank. Back then it was a proper sport on proper wages.”

“Didn’t tell me you were professional.”

“Not me, no, but the lads who did, you know, in the big clubs, got a normal wage and were grateful. Didn’t drive around in flashy cars back then. None of this status symbol and wags.”

“Wags?”

“Wives and girlfriends.”

“Oh yeah. And none of this rolling over in ‘pain’ with the slighted nudge. Lads knew how to tackle back then.”

“They’re all sissies nowadays. That’s why I prefer watching rugby.”

“Gentleman’s sport.”

“And they’re built like men. You know, big, strapping.”

“I do, Ted.”

“The footies are all tall and lanky, like matchsticks.”

“Don’t make them like they used to, Ted.”

You can sign up to receive these blog posts daily or weekly so you don’t miss anything… and follow me on Twitter where each new posting is automatically announced. You can also read / download my eBooks (including Story A Day May 2011) and free eShorts at Smashwords, Sony Reader Store, Barnes & Noble, iTunes Bookstore, Kobo and Amazon, with more to follow. I have a new forum and you can follow me on Twitter, friend me on Facebook, like me on Facebook, connect with me on LinkedIn, find me on Tumblr, complete my website’s Contact me page or plain and simple, email me.  I also now have a new blog creation service especially for, but not limited to, writers.

Unfortunately, as I post an interview a day (amongst other things) I can’t review books but I have a feature called ‘Short Story Saturdays’ where I review stories of up to 2,500 words. Alternatively if you have a short story or self-contained novel extract / short chapter (ideally up to 1000 words) that you’d like critiqued and don’t mind me reading it / talking about and critiquing it (I send you the transcription afterwards so you can use the comments or ignore them)  on my ‘Bailey’s Writing Tips’ podcast, then do email me. They are weekly episodes, usually released Monday mornings UK time, interweaving the recordings between the red pen sessions with the hints & tips episodes. I am now also looking for flash fiction (<1000 words) for Flash Fiction Fridays and poetry for Post-weekend Poetry.

 

Tuesday Tales 017: Siesta

Armed with online writing group Tuesday Tales’s seventeenth prompt ‘chest’, my eleventh short story for them, I got writing and below is the result.

Tuesday Tales provides a new prompt each week, the members write a story inspired by it and post it on our blogs / websites. Then we email the link and first two or three sentences to Jean Joachim. She then posts them on the Tuesday Tales blog (on a Tuesday ), gives us the link, then we go out and shout about it. So, without further ado, here is my 316-word second-person story.

Siesta

You can’t help staring at his chest. Only a mammoth has more hair than Eddie. It’s the only thing you dislike about his body so you close your eyes and think of proverbial England… the country of your birth… the country you miss, despite everything you have here.

Eddie mistakes your closed eyes for ecstasy and gives one last thrust, groaning as he does so, then flops back to his side of the bed and promptly falls asleep, the effort clearly too much. He puts his constant lethargy down to advancing years but you tell him that fifty is the new thirty so he’s thirty-two. You put it down to his sedentary lifestyle, easily done where you are, except you go out and find things to do. Solo but not solo, enjoying other people’s company but wishing it was Eddie’s.

You look at the expanse of hair – more of it, it seems, due to his expanding girth – and you watch it rise and fall. The mouth above it whimpers and you catch your name. Soft, romantic, like you know Eddie to be… under all that hair. He’s grown his head hair long, dark like his chest, looks like a rock star only he doesn’t play the guitar so well.

Leaning in, you smell the still-evident aftershave, the last of the Duty Free. You rub his chest, determined to make friends with the mammoth, remind yourself that Eddie can be an animal in bed when he’s not so tired, then your hand stops… replays, just to be sure, and it is sure. You’re sure. You’ve felt this before… with Frank. Images flood your brain: beeping machines, shaking heads, forms to sign.

You feel a sensation in your nose, you always do before you cry, but you sniff away the tears as Eddie opens his eyes.

You smile, kiss his chest, then go downstairs to make the dinner.

This story is one of twelve to be found here. The links to the earlier prompts, and resulting stories, and the forthcoming prompts can be found on this blog’s Tuesday Tales page. Do go and check out the Tuesday Tales blog – it’s a wonderful idea supported by talented writers.

So, not only can you read these stories but you could also write your own using the prompts given each week. There’s no word count limit. Single-word prompts are something I regularly give my Monday night workshop and it’s amazing how different our stories can be. You can read some of mine (free and otherwise) at Smashwords, Sony Reader Store, Barnes & Noble, iTunes Bookstore and Kobo. My eBooks are now on Amazon, with more to follow, and I also have a quirky second-person viewpoint story in charity anthology Telling Tales.

I have a new forum at http://morgenbailey.freeforums.org and you can follow me on Twitter, friend me on Facebook, like me on Facebook, link with me on LinkedIn, complete my website’s ‘Contact me‘ page or plain and simple, email me.

 

Tuesday Tales 014: Once-perfect

Armed with the prompt ‘legs’, my eighth short story for online writing group ’Tuesday Tales’, I started writing as I walking into town this lunchtime to meet my mate Caroline (to see ‘The Artist’, which I’d already seen but was still brilliant) and below is the result. For a change, it’s not second-person viewpoint but it is written from my usual dark side, and this is probably one of my darkest. And thanks go to Mr Tibbs for one of the key plot points.

Tuesday Tales provides a new prompt each week, the members write a story inspired by it and post it on our blogs / websites. Then we email the link and first two or three sentences to Jean Joachim. She then posts them on the Tuesday Tales blog (on a Tuesday ), gives us the link then we go out and shout about it. So, without further ado, here is my 328-worder…

Once-perfect

It was the legs that the old man saw first. He couldn’t be sure, thinking them part of a tree, but then his dog started barking. Ted had seen plenty of dead bodies; his wife, his son, friends, but face-up… serene, dignified, not face-down, skirt torn, scratches threading through once-perfect tights. Violating a once-perfect human, he suspected.

The red shoes were the only brightness about her. Ted imagined them sequined, clicking, to take her off elsewhere, only he can’t have imagined a place like this, Uldean Woods, to have been her destination of choice.

Part-buried under leaves he wanted to move them, see the rest of her, but he knew all about forensics, how finding the scene untouched was part of the fun, so he pulled out his mobile phone and dialled the familiar number.

***

The van turned up quicker than he’d expected, obviously a quiet morning.

“Hey, Jack… Charlie… Stan. Good to see you.”

While Stan switched on his camera and lined up the first shot, Ted watched Charlie haul his case out of the van and put on latex gloves, smiling at the sound they made as they slapped against his flesh.

Jack and Ted stood in silence as the other two men worked. Ted always loved to see such professionalism – no longer sorry, if he had been, to be the one to find the body.

“Done with what we have, Chief,” Charlie said, Stan having finished taking photos a few minutes before.

“OK. Who wants to move her?” Jack asked.

The men looked at each other but none spoke. Stan licked his lips.

“Ted?” Jack offered.

Ted beamed and crouched down by her feet. Holding both ankles tenderly, he pulled her towards him then shot back, falling awkwardly.

Charlie screamed like a girl.

“That’s it?” Jack asked, no emotion showing in his voice or face.

“Uh huh,” Stan said.

Ted shrugged his shoulders.

“Hey ho,” Jack continued. “Never been fussed about the top half anyway.”

Sorry, I did warn you. The links to the earlier prompts, and resulting stories, and the forthcoming prompts can be found on this blog’s Tuesday Tales page. Do go and check out the Tuesday Tales blog – it’s a wonderful idea supported by talented writers.

So, not only can you read these stories but you could also write your own using the prompts given each week. There’s no word count limit. Single-word prompts are something I regularly give my Monday night workshop and it’s amazing how different our stories can be. You can read some of mine (free and otherwise) at Smashwords, Sony Reader Store, Barnes & Noble, iTunes Bookstore and Kobo. And I have a new forum at http://morgenbailey.freeforums.org.

 

Guest post: Character communications by author Chris Redding

I’m delighted to bring you this guest blog post, today on the topic of communication, by humorous romantic suspense novelist Chris Redding.

Communication is about independence and intimacy.

Men tend to focus on independence. They give orders and tell people what to do. Women crave intimacy. For instance, a man will make plans without consulting his wife. (Not all men) He will see no reason to “ask permission” of his wife. He actually views it that way. He would see it as not being able to act independently of her.  He sees it as being the underling if he has to ask permission. Even though it isn’t really asking permission, but consulting the wife about her plans. (Which is how she would see it.)

Here you can add conflict. The hero makes a unilateral decision be it about a social event or in the heat of running from the bad guys. He doesn’t see why he needs to clear it with the heroine. Of course she wants to be in on the decision-making process so we have conflict between the two. He doesn’t understand why she needs to be part of making the decision.

It is the same mindset when men go out and spend money. They don’t feel they need to “ask permission”. My husband once bought a car without any input from me. He was going through a rough time and I think he needed to assert his independence not so much from me, but from his job. I didn’t make a big deal about it, but the next time he bought I car I mentioned it. And of course he had no idea that I would feel that way.  Until I told him.

Intimacy says we’re close and connected. Women bond with each other, especially through talking. In feeling connected, two women feel symmetry. They are equals.

Independence is connected to status. Men like independence and their lives are about status. So status and independence are asymmetrical. Both people in a contest cannot have the upper hand.

Imagine someone other than the hero interested in the heroine. There would be an automatic competition between the two men. Conflict! Not huge conflict, but enough to show another side of your hero.

In ancient societies, men protected women. It is still in their biology to do that. There aren’t man-eating animals that women face on a daily basis so they do it other ways. (Quick story: In a bar recently with a mixed group. Someone else we knew asked one of the guys in the groups to help her get this guy off of her. Now he doesn’t even like her, but she was clearly scared of this other guy hanging on her. So my friend asked the guy to leave. Twice, nicely. The guy, of course, gave him a hard time, and they almost came to blows. My friend was willing to protect this woman merely because she was a woman.)

A mother naturally protects her children.  But when a woman extends her protection to a man he bristles at it. He sees himself as a lower rank, a child. Since I was a kid in the age before widespread seatbelt use, if my father had to brake suddenly he would put his hand out to protect whoever was in the front passenger seat. I developed the same habit driving.

Fast forward a few years. I begin delivering pizza and using a seatbelt on a regular basis. I’m driving with my boyfriend (the one who convinced me to wear a seatbelt) and I have to break suddenly. My arm goes out. He thought that was the most ridiculous thing. He made fun of me for it for awhile. Looking back, it wasn’t about me. It was about him feeling as if I’d lowered him in the hierarchy of our relationship.

This post is an excerpt from her workshop Show Up Naked: Writing the Male POV. That’s really interesting, thank you Chris… I’m going off now to go see how my characters are communicating… or not.

Chris Redding lives in New Jersey with her husband, two kids and various animals. She graduated from Penn State with a degree in journalism. When she isn’t writing, she works part time for her local hospital. Her latest book out is ‘A View to a Kilt’, a humorous romantic suspense.

You can find Chris Redding: www.chrisreddingauthor.com, http://chrisredddingauthor.blogspot.com, www.facebook.com/chrisreddingauthor and www.twitter.com/chrisredding.

If you would like to write a writing-related guest post for my blog then feel free to email me with an outline of what you would like to write about. If it’s writing-related then it’s highly likely I’d email back and say “yes please” (while quietly bouncing up and down in my seat with joy!). You can also read / download my eBooks at Smashwords.

 

Author interview (and blog) feedback sought

Hello everyone. I’ll keep this brief because Marla is waiting in the wings to guest blog but I’d love your opinion on the interviews I post here (and anything else you’d like to mention about my blog). I’m conscious that by posting an interview a day you will have a lot to read through so…

• Are they too long? Would you prefer a selected maximum of questions?
• Do you find them enjoyable to read or do you switch off part-way?
• Are there questions that you feel don’t need to be asked?
• Is there a topic we haven’t discussed that you would like covered?
• Is there a genre you’d like to read more about or are they fairly evenly spread?
• Generally do you find they are helpful / useful?
• Are they posted too regularly? (not sure I can do much about this as I have so many enquiries but it would be useful to know)

And about the blog itself…

• Can you find the information you want easily?
• Is there too much information here, is it overwhelming?
• Is there anything you’d like to read less of?
• Is there anything you’d like to read more of?
• If you’ve read any, are the guest blogs / author spotlights too short / long or about right?
• I’d like to include more poetry; any suggestions?
• Is there anything writing-related that I don’t cover on this blog that I could perhaps include?
• Do you have a favourite section / page on the blog?
• If you’ve been involved in anything here do you feel it was worthwhile?

I look forward to hearing your views; positive and ‘constructive’ – I’ve received rejections, I can handle it!  

I have the current format booked up until the end of the year but ongoing it’ll be really interesting to learn what is working and what isn’t (if anything ).

If you would prefer to email me directly rather than leave a comment here, you can email me at morgen@morgenbailey.com.

Thank you.

Morgen x

 

Transcription of BWT podcast episode 28 (Feb 2011) – hints & tips pt2

The twenty-eighth episode of the Bailey’s Writing Tips podcast was released on 28^th February 2011 and the content has never been released other than website links (on my website http://www.morgenbailey.com) so I hope you find this information useful. In the first twenty-seven episodes (see http://morgenbailey.wordpress.com/bwt-podcast for details), I covered ‘show not tell’, the five senses, repetition, points of view, tenses, dialogue, characters, crime, poetry, short stories, novels, writing for children, scriptwriting, comedy, romance and chick lit, erotica, ‘writing rules’, historical & the classics, name & characters, Christmas, opportunities, songwriting, reading, auto/biographies, computer tips (parts 1&2), competitions & submissions, romance and hints & tips (part 1). This episode was hints & tips pt2. This episode also contained some competitions and although the dates have passed, I have left the details in as it will show you what was available and many competitions are yearly so they may well be run again in 2012. Please note: I can’t vouch for these competitions so do check the information thoroughly before parting with your hard-earned writing and money but having a competition win or shortlist is always a good thing to have on your writing CV so I would recommend having a go.

Hints & tips

• Colours work really well in any kind of piece, especially if they relate to a mood; e.g. a bleak grey sky, a yellow top worn by someone with a happy disposition (others include green (often thought of as envy), white (pure/simple), red (anger/passion)). They all help the reader to picture a scene.
• Equally when you’re setting a scene, think that buildings have a ‘feeling’ e.g. drab council offices or majestic stately home. How do they make your character and the reader feel? In some stories, the setting becomes almost like a character in its own right so you might like to consider that when writing yours.
• Passion: I’m not talking romance (necessarily) but there should be emotions in every story. This could be desire, fear, love, grief, anger, jealousy etc.
• Outdoor or unusual locations: rather than have the action happening in a room, how about somewhere like a forest, farm, church, boat, beach, hospital, construction site or even on a rocket? There could also be locations with restrictions e.g. library or art gallery where the characters have to whisper or to the other extreme where they have to be loud; a nightclub or funfair.
• As well as things happening or items mentioned, think of what’s not there, using words such as no, not, never, nothing, none, no-one, nowhere, neither, nor etc. Negatives are great and it gives you another perspective to the story. Lee Child’s book ‘Nothing to lose’ is a great example: “and there was nothing in his pockets except paper money, an expired passport, an ATM card, a folding foot brush…there was nothing waiting for him anywhere else, no storage unit in a distant city, nothing stashed with friends, he owned the things in his pockets, the clothes on his back and the shoes on his feet…”. It gives a great idea of the simple life that this character leads who literally has…nothing to lose.
• Do you ever dream? Or more importantly, do you ever dream and remember the details? If you do, write them down before you forget and see if it might make a story or poem. Dreams can often provide you with incredible stories because there seems to be such a freedom of the mind when we dream. It’s been said, ‘dreams are a window into our very soul’. If this is true, then writing from our dreams could be a great way to write from our hearts, and in that, find out what we’re passionate about. I always keep a notebook and pen or mobile (on which I can dictate) beside my bed. If I dream something that I think I can use in a story, I always jot it down for future reference. Fantasies provide us with another great way to glean new story ideas. We all fantasise at some point in our lives. It can happen in school, in a meeting, on an elevator, etc. This is another great way to open up and stretch your imagination for new stories. Take time to sit and allow your mind to take you wherever it wants to go. It’s amazing what ideas for story lines and scenes, come to light during this time.
• Think of things that are unusual pairs e.g. a petite blonde called Buffy turning out to be a vampire slayer. You could certainly lead your reader to think one thing then have the total opposite happen.
• You might find when you’re writing that something keeps trying to bog you down, such as that old feeling that your writing isn’t good enough and that your technique is not up to par. Don’t worry about your technique for now. Just get it down on paper, put it away for a while and move on to something else. When you come back to it you should spot where you’re going wrong (and right!).
• Practice makes perfect – I always compare writing to playing a piano. If you’ve never played, you’re not going to come out with a concerto. Your first attempts may be more like chopsticks or even just the scales but the more you do it (even just a flash fiction length a day), the better you will become.
• Journaling is a great tool for writers. It’s a place where we can write down all our secrets, thoughts, ideas, scenes that suddenly come to mind, sounds or smell or sights that we don’t want to forget and anything else that pops in our heads. Journals, in a way, can become a friend to us, or a confidant that we share with. For some, it is our chance to open up ourselves and become extremely vulnerable. This is a tool that writers can use to stretch and improve their writing skills.
• Observation is a key tool to discovering how the world works. As an observer, try a few different ways to discover new ideas for your writing: Imagine the scene as if you were experiencing it or seeing it for the first time; Imagine the scene as you are now; Imagine the scene as if you were seeing it for the last time because it won’t happen again in your lifetime; By doing this you will give yourself a broader writing point-of-view. You will open up the doors to great storytelling and your characters will become much more realistic and reliable to your readers. You will also find that your readers will connect better with them. People are constantly fascinating me. The way they act, speak, watch, look, dress, walk, etc. I could sit in one spot and watch people pass by for hours. There are so many places to ‘people watch’ such as: the airport, shopping centres, buses or any other transport system, when you’re stuck in traffic, in a dentist or doctor’s, etc. Don’t just watch, but discover how the people react to what’s happening to them and around them. Ask yourself questions about why they do what they do? Why do they look happy or sad? Are they on holiday? Where are they from? Why are they here? There are so many questions, and it’s these questions that can lead you to new story ideas. Let them flow and write down your answers. People-watching can stretch the borders of our imagination. Wherever you go, always bring paper and a pen with you. You never know what will happen. You might just see something that will spark your imagination and set you on a new journey of storytelling.
• Sounds are important to describe in any story. They give more shape and substance to your scenes. Your readers become more entranced when they are given more information. Reading should be like living for your reader. It should be a world that contains all the senses. Touch, taste, smell, sound, sight – these are all key to making your story come alive for your reader. Listen to the sounds around you, wherever you are. Take a moment to close your eyes (but not if you’re driving) and listen to what is happening instead of just watching. Write down the sounds you hear around you and give a detailed account of each of them. Good listening skills can and will increase your ability to write great stories. By listening, you become more aware and prepared to provide details of the sounds you need to make your story credible.
• The most important thing is to ENJOY YOURSELF. Let the writing flow. Don’t worry about editing as you go along. Certainly you can edit along the way if that makes you happy. But you might enjoy the creative writing process more fully if you let your imagination lead the way – and let the creativity fall into place.
• Talking of editing – if you take something out of a sentence/paragraph does it still work? Does it still have the same impact? If yes to both questions, then you can make the chop. Remember to be brutal as an editor is likely to put red lines through a lot of your work so if you can beat him/her to it you’ll get less red back on your manuscript. I’m as big a culprit as anyone and that’s what our Monday nights are for. J
• Look at adverbs: if you say that something was ‘completely severed’ do you need the ‘completely’? Likewise ‘totally destroyed’ and smiled happily (unless of course you want your character to smile sadly)?
• If you’re having trouble with a story, how well do you know it? Jot down the answers to the following questions (thanks to NAWG’s Dec 2008 Link magazine and www.writers-toolkit.co.uk) and see if this helps: What is your character’s name? (if you can’t answer that, you’re in trouble); what century is it?; what country is it?; what sort of building (if applicable) is it?; what are they sleeping on?; are there sheets and blankets?; what texture are they?; what can they see from the window?; what is the first thing they hear when they wake up?; what are they wearing?; what colours can they see?; what can they smell?; what time of year is it?; what time of day is it?; what was the last thing they ate?; what is their greatest problem? Not all the questions will be relevant but it may help, and the final question should be key to any story.
• A tip from many a podcast – trim down the ‘ings’ as they, apparently, weaken verbs. An example would be was instead of ‘Walking into the kitchen, he picked up a knife…’ it would be better to be more direct; ‘He walked into the kitchen and picked up a knife.” I have mixed feelings on this as I think it varies the sentences but one narrator (Jordan Castillo Price in her ‘Packing Heat’ podcast said that’s a bad thing).
• I’d be really interested to know what you when you’re writing and you need to fill something in later. Do you just leave a gap? Perhaps underlined? Or a row of crosses? A regular help for me if I’ve to add further content is to put ‘MORE HERE’ and when I go back into the document I can just select the Find option (Ctrl F) or search options and type in ‘more here’ and the computer takes me to the first/next instance/s. It’s great.
• Writing prompts are a fantastic way of getting inspiration. You can either pick a single word (as we do in my Monday workshop group – perhaps from something you see in the room or from a newspaper) and see where it leads you, or pick some from the internet (doing a Google search on ‘writing prompt’ brings up loads of helpful links).
• Beginnings and endings – does your beginning start with a hook? If, as is often the case, the action gets going after a paragraph or two (or more?), then either lose the first section completely or filter it in elsewhere. Equally, if you re-read your ending, do you feel that it works better without the last paragraph or two. Try finishing it earlier and see what happens.
• On an interview I heard with Elmore Leonard (who I hadn’t realised had written ‘Ocean’s Eleven’ and ‘3.10 to Yuma’, both great films) he said don’t start a story with the weather, which reminds me of a book called ‘It was a dark and stormy night’ – a beginning from Edward Bulwer-Lytton’s 1830 novel ‘Paul Clifford’ which is often quoted as an example bad beginning. I have a book of the same name which is “the ‘best’ of the ‘best’ dreadful beginnings from the American Bulwer-Lytton contest”.
• Endings can be tricky. They have a variety of functions; some tie everything up neatly whilst others can leave the reader to work it out for themselves. Twist-in-the-tales are very popular – Take a Break especially love them. Endings work if they provoke a laugh, tear, ooh or ahh. Tips on endings include: strong final images provoke emotional endings; the later the punch, the stronger the reader’s emotion especially with twists; you could work backwards by writing five endings (or five lines from some of your existing stories) then writing stories to lead up to them.
• If you find a website that has some great information on the topic that you are looking for, remember that they may well have a ‘links’ page which will usually feature other websites of a similar vein. You may lose a few hours going through them all but it would be worth it if you find a gem.
• Crime writer Barbara Cleverly suggests:
• Listen to your work as you write. Read it aloud. If it sounds awkward, it is. Rewrite. i.e. make every effort to make your work a joy to read.
• If you have some cash to spend on your writing, buy: Sir Ernest Gowers’ Plain Words, The Economist Style Guide, and Suspense Novels by Lesley Grant Adamson.
• ‘Write about what you know?’. Rubbish! Seriously, how many readers are going to be interested? Write instead about what you find fascinating. Immerse yourself in your chosen background.
• ‘Everyone has a novel in him/her.’ Again, rubbish! And if you have, one’s not enough these days. Publishers offer three book deals. They won’t take a chance on a writer who has only one book in prospect.
• It is nearly impossible to get your work read nowadays. Choose a small reputable agent and present it neatly and professionally. If it’s crime you’re working on, the CWA Debut Dagger Award (www.thecwa.co.uk/daggers/debut/index.html) is well worth a shot. Your script will be read and if it’s any good will be noticed.
  • Writer/teacher Vivien Hampshire (http://vivienhampshire.blogspot.com) had a lovely article in Dec 2004 National Association of Writers’ Group magazine ‘Link’ which included: “What makes a good story? Forget about genres and plots and sub-plots. Read to them (new writing students) something with an opening line that hooks them in, a really strong central character they can believe in and care about, and an ending they will laugh or cry over… a story they will remember days later, a story that makes them feel good, and one that will inspire them to try having a go at writing their own. Writing is not about knowing the right words to say. It is not about some secret code that only other writers understand. It should not be the preserve of the literary snobs, all trying to impress with their in-depth knowledge. Writing comes from the heart. It’s a feeling, knowing what we like the sound of, what stories we have enjoyed, what works for us, even though we may not be able to explain why.”
  • I mentioned show don’t tell earlier and short story writer / tutor Joanna Barnden (http://www.joannabarnden.co.uk) has the following advice: “By using dialogue to introduce characters instead of just telling readers about them; by starting in the middle of a key bit of action instead of with passive description or a summary of events; by grasping the main scene of the story with both hands and really bringing it to life with sensory and emotional details; by showing emotions happening e.g.: ‘he flung the book down’, rather than telling us about them: ‘he was cross’. But please don’t forget the services of the sometimes neglected ‘tell’! If your story is about a woman’s relationship with her husband we might need to know that they have children, but we do not need flashbacks of her giving birth/reading bedtime stories/going to the park etc (unless they are pertinent to the key issue, such as if a child is disabled and it’s putting a terrible strain on the marriage).” Joanna also offers a very inexpensive critique and re-read service – see her website.

Competitions

• Thanks to Auriol from Northampton, England for two travel writing competitions from Skyscanner. One has an 18^th March deadline (to win an iPad!), the other is a rolling monthly Twitter-based comp.
• http://bridgehousepublishing.co.uk/newsubmissions.aspx is seeking sci-fi stories (up to 8000 words by 31^st March 2011) – for publication a year later.
• The Buxton Festival Poetry Competition is now open and submissions are welcome until 1^st April 2011 – see www.derby.ac.uk/buxtonpoetrycompetition for more information.
• I was sent an email by www.christinemichael.org for their Thyks Poetry Competition. See www.christinemichael.org/thynkspoetrycompetition for details – deadline 30th April 2011.
• Ware Poets Open Poetry Competition 2011: Closing date 30^th April. Sole Judge: Carole Satyamurti. For poems up to 50 lines. First Prize £500. Sonnet Prize: £100.  For further details send SAE to The Secretary, Ware Poets Open Poetry Competition 2011, Clothall End House, California, Baldock, Herts, SG7 6NU or see www.poetrypf.co.uk/images/compware2011.pdf.
• Check out all the current UK poetry competitions at www.poetrylibrary.org.uk/competitions.
• Joanna is starting a new course on writing magazine fiction serials (most of the leading women’s magazines do them); the first one-day workshop will be held in the Midlands on Thursday April 7th – see www.joannabarnden.co.uk for info.

The podcast concluded with sentence starts, Quotes, News & Feedback, On This Day in History and a 60-worder called ‘Holiday let-down’: “Break a leg!” a colleague shouted as Dr Jack Warley left for his Austrian ski-ing holiday. He chuckled as he drove home. Just an hour later he was undressed and showered. He adjusted his dressing gown belt as he started down the stairs…not noticing his son’s toy 4×4 on the step below. He heard his fibula snap as he tumbled.

That’s it. Thanks for visiting – a list of the other transcripts and summaries can be found at http://morgenbailey.wordpress.com/bwt-podcast.

 

Transcription of BWT podcast episode 27 (Feb 2011) – hints & tips (pt1)

The twenty-seventh episode of the Bailey’s Writing Tips podcast was released on 21^st February 2011 and the content has never been released other than website links (on my website http://www.morgenbailey.com) so I hope you find this information useful. In the first twenty-six episodes (see http://morgenbailey.wordpress.com/bwt-podcast for details), I covered ‘show not tell’, the five senses, repetition, points of view, tenses, dialogue, characters, crime, poetry, short stories, novels, writing for children, scriptwriting, comedy, romance and chick lit, erotica, ‘writing rules’, historical & the classics, name & characters, Christmas, opportunities, songwriting, reading, auto/biographies, computer tips (parts 1&2), competitions & submissions and romance. This episode had a focus on hints & tips. It included some outdated competitions but I’ve left them in as they’re likely to run yearly.

Hints & tips

National Association of Writers’ Groups’ Link magazine back in June 2006 had a table entitled ‘Imagination used’ which defines how we use our brains – it was split into:

Under 5 years           95-98% used 6-12 years               50%-70%

13-18 years              30%-50% Adults                    less than 20%

So if you think you need some help or perhaps just a little inspiration…do listen on.

• Fellow Northamptonshire author (of the ‘Housewife’ series) Alison Penton-Harper has the following tips: write every day, even if it’s not much. Always carry a notebook. Make sure that you’re comfortable when you write so that you can become lost in ‘the zone’ without straining your neck/back/eyes. Edit ruthlessly. If it’s not essential to the story, take it out. When you can’t see the wood for the trees, walk away and leave it alone. Be prepared to accept constructive criticism, but be careful whom you ask for it. Read Stephen King’s book ‘On writing’. There may be a good writers’ group you can join where you can share the experience of the writing process and discuss your work.” Sounds good to me.
• However trivial it may seem, write down everything. It’s also worth checking whether your phone (or even camera) has dictaphone facilities as you never know when the muse might strike. An idea that is at the top of your memory, the one that is the ‘bestseller’, and you are sure you will not forget it, will be lost almost as fast as you thought of it, if you do not write it down. Later, as you review your ideas, something that seemed so-so, may still be only so-so, but may be just the idea that you needed to jump-start a new project, or give fuel to one you are already working on. I keep two Word documents; one for ideas that may work (i.e. have enough ‘legs’) for novels/anthologies, the other for short stories (although some transferred to the novels file if the ‘legs’ become longer).
• If you find it difficult to spare time to writing, try small chunks; ten minutes before you do anything else in the morning, while a meal is cooking or before you go to bed (be warned the latter may lead to some loss of sleep as the ideas whizz around in your brain although some authors if stuck go to sleep on an idea and have a solution in the morning). Writing is like housework or homework, if you do it in small chunks you don’t miss the time. It’s when you don’t do any for ages and have to do it in one go that you perhaps start to resent (hopefully not) the ‘loss’ of time. When I did NaNoWriMo for the first time it was surprising, knowing I had to write nearly 1700 words a day, how often I could find time to write a few words because I had to do it. If you can ask yourself at the end of each day “how many words did I write today?” and can answer with a number above zero then you should feel good. Even if you do 50 a day that’s a magazine-length short story a fortnight.
• Something that works really well for me is to keep a small magazine holder in my bathroom containing a pot of pens/pencils and an A5 spiral-bound notebook. From a list of sentence beginnings I’d created (e.g. As she jumped off the…), I wrote one beginning at the top of each page and then I made sure that every time I spent any time in the bathroom I did some writing, even if it’s just another sentence. It’s amazing how much I wrote over short amounts of time. I’ll then type the story up when the pages are full or the story is complete (or if I get hooked on any of them and want to crack on with them quickly).
• Back in episode 3 I mentioned the Pocket Encyclopaedia of Short Story Writing which contained a list of 350 alternatives to said (although it’s often said that ‘said’ is still the best word to use). Well, I’ve found a list of 154 courtesy of the sci-fi website Science Fiction & Fantasy Chronicles Network.
• If your story is a little dull, look at your plain verbs. Do you have a character walking? If so, could they be strolling, ambling, jogging, dashing, sprinting or staggering? Or if s/he is sitting, could s/he be sprawling, lounging, curled up, stretched out? Or if they say something could they mumble, stutter, spew, shout or protest? Finally, if s/he is looking, could they be scanning, squinting, glaring or studying? This also helps to avoid adverbs e.g. she ran quickly = she sprinted.
• Set aside a small empty box or plastic wallet and put all your ideas (e.g. newspaper clippings or using the notes you’ve made from your above notebooks) in it…but make sure you continue/type them up.
• Listen to how people speak, and incorporate accents into your writing, e.g. greetings such as ‘my flower’, ‘me duck’, ‘love’ etc. (without too going overboard and confusing your reader). Local websites with video links may well be of use. www.youtube.com is also a great source: put the town/city you’re after and accent in the search box and see what comes up.
• Even if you haven’t written a novel, have a go at writing a one-page biography, one-page synopsis (of your poem, story, whatever), humorous cover letter or, if you do have a novel on the go, the first two chapters. Then when you have a novel ready, you’ll either have the practice of everything else to go with it, or you’ll have everything ready (with, no doubt, some tweaking).
• Get a first reader. There’s nothing like a second opinion, especially from another writer and the more the merrier. If you have email, you can swap your work quickly and easily, and do be honest with each other; someone saying it’s great (as friends and family often do) is lovely but not very helpful. Things to look out for are ‘show don’t tell’ (i.e. where something happens or is said but then you go on to explain what happened), repetitive words (unless intended), boring sections (I said to be honest) or parts that seem unclear (it’s good for the reader to have some questions but they should be answered by the end of the piece). Equally, be positive and point out parts that work. If the author knows where they’re going right then they can do more of the same and avoid repeating any bad habits or bits that don’t work.
• Even if you’re not writing poetry, think of how your words sound e.g. alliteration http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alliteration. Writing sounds better read aloud and even better with rhythm.
• Quietly unassuming is not necessarily boring. Take Sean Connery’s James Bond for instance. He was suave and charming…but there was more to him. You don’t want to make a character dull or boring as the reader will be bored (and you’ll probably be bored writing him/her) but you can make them surprising; lead them in one direction (or appear to be one thing) and then reveal a hidden layer – like someone coming on to the X-Factor stage and it being assumed from their appearance that they are going to be awful but then they open their mouth… that’s how Susan Boyle became such a success.
• With any story it’s vital to keep a pace, and therefore the reader’s interest, going. Keep the scenes short and to the point but, in fiction mainly, leave holes so that threads tie up nicely at the end. A mix of short and long sentences is always good, as are questions that rest in the reader’s mind as they read. As well as bringing the story to life, dialogue is very important as it splits up the prose (and should always advance the plot) but stories work well with a good mixture. If you remember that dialogue usually shows and narrative generally tells, and the golden rule is “show, don’t tell”, then it’s best to have a mixture of both for the story to work well. Dialogue is also a very economical use of character development as you get a feel for the character by what they say as well as their tone.
• I’ve mentioned song lyrics before and it’s worth listening to your favourite (or not so favourite) songs as most tell a story. While the lyrics themselves are copyright, the story they tell isn’t. Or a quicker way is to look up the lyrics online (e.g. www.lyricsdirectory.com or www.findmelyrics.co.uk) and if there are any stories that appeal, re-write them as fiction (obviously also changing any names).
• If your story isn’t quite working, try changing the viewpoint (i.e. from 1^st person (I) to 3^rd person (he/she) or vice versa – or have a go at 2^nd (you – mentioned above)) or by tense (present to past or vice versa). Present tense is very immediate and often works really well.
• Endings: Do you, or have you ever thought about starting with the end of your story? Lucy from my writing group mentioned a while back that that’s how she usually starts her poems. Most people have an idea of where their story will end but it’s a great idea to try an ending as a starting point then work backwards and see if it helps your writing. Whilst endings should round off all the loose ends, if you plan to write a sequel (or even a series) then leaving it at a cliff-hanger, as you would at most chapter endings.
• Speaking of endings, here’s a tip courtesy of a podcast I heard a while back. Think about the order within your sentence. Apparently the last half of a sentence has more impact to a reader than the first half and therefore the action should happen at or towards the end. The example given ‘They swam across the river on a very hot day’… was suggested to work better as ‘On a very hot day they swam across the river’.
• Think of double-meanings. For instance one of my beginnings is Advert: ‘Part-time lover wanted. Must be flexible…’ which could be taken in at least two ways. Others include ‘As a small business, Heald’s Nursery was struggling…’ (is the nursery a kindergarten or garden centre?) and Holly was prickly at the best of times… (plant or woman?). The Two Ronnies were famous for their double-entendres (do you remember 4 candles?). ‘Your nuts, my Lord’ is another example; see the 2-minute video at www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2e0afvMYqI&. A link to Fork handles (and many others) is on the same page. Be warned, you could be watching for hours. In the recent ‘Up in the Air’ movie with George Clooney, there was a scene where an air stewardess gives him a drink then is perceived as asking “cancer?” but when he’s clearly confused, she repeats it slow as ‘can sir?’ then holding a can out. I’m not sure why the scene was in there as it didn’t further the plot but it was useful for this podcast.

Competitions

• http://fracturedwest.com has a rolling deadline. Fractured West is a “new literary magazine for flash fiction, prose poetry, microfiction, sudden fiction, vignettes, and short short stories. We don’t care about definitions: if it’s short, we want it.” Max 500 words. Sounds interesting.
• Another ‘roller’ is www.memoirsink.com/statuscontest although word max is 144 characters!
• www.sumlitsem.org/slscontest.html is SLS United Literary Contest but be quick – the deadline is 28^th February.
• The Write Place Open Short Story Competition also has a closing date of 28th February 2011. Story 1500 words max. Theme: Winter.  Fee £4.50 per entry. Prizes £100, £75, £50. Entries to Francesca Burgess, TWP Winter Competition, 34 Capelands, New Ash Green, Longfield, Kent, DA3 8LG. Make cheques payable to The Write Place‚. See www.thewriteplace.org.uk for info.
• Magma Poetry is a quarterly magazine which is looking for submissions for their 47^th edition. The deadline is also 28^th February – for more details see http://magmapoetry.com/contributions.
• www.upstreet-mag.org/guideline_layers.html and www.snakenationpress.org/contests.html both have 1^st March deadlines.
• http://unboundpress.com/competitions/2011-unbound-press-competitions/2011-unbound-press-short-story-award has a deadline of 1^st March 2011. 1500 words maximum. £5 fee.
• The Neil Gunn writing competition has a theme of ‘A wrong turning’ and welcome poetry (up to 40 lines) and prose (up to 2500 words). Entry fee £5. Deadline 11 March 2011. See www.highland.gov.uk/leisureandtourism/libraries/neilgunn.

The podcast concluded with sentence starts, Quotes, News & Feedback, On This Day in History and a 60-worder called ‘DIY doh!’: “Women are useless at DIY” Josh scoffed as he watched his girlfriend getting some steps out to change a light bulb. “Give them here!” He grabbed the bulb and ladder to do the job himself. Wearing slippers, he carefully stepped up, did the deed – then cut his finger on the old bulb as he threw it in the recycling!

That’s it. Thanks for visiting – a list of the other transcripts and summaries can be found at http://morgenbailey.wordpress.com/bwt-podcast.

 

Podcast: Bailey’s Writing Tips – Episode 035 (25th July 2011)

Episode 35 of the Bailey’s Writing Tips podcast was released today and is available from iTunes, Google’s Feedburner, Podbean (when it catches up), Podcasters (which takes even longer!) or Podcast Alley (which doesn’t list the episodes but will let you subscribe) where you can subscribe or just listen).

I’d not covered poetry for quite a while so I thought I’d do it for this episode which culminates in a poetry freebie. Websites mentioned were:

Poetry – general

www.nationalpoetryday.co.uk, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Poetry_Book_Society,

www.poetrysociety.org.uk, www.secondlightlive.co.uk

Hints & Tips

https://www.writers-online.co.uk/Home-Study, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Villanelle, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Haiku

Ideas

• Using the five sense (sight, sound, smell, taste, touch) look around wherever you are in now and write a poem about it;
• Flick through a magazine and find a picture of a place that you like the look of and write a poem about it.

And the seven sentence starts picked from my http://twitter.com/sentencestarts Twitter page were:

1.    It was the news they’d all been waiting for…

2.    The girls giggled as the picture looked like…

3.    “Just press the left-hand side into the…”

4.    Counting sheep didn’t help…

5.    “What will you do if he’s there?”…

6.    Benson breathed in and stepped up to the microphone…

7.    The proud parents sat in the audience…

Recommendations

www.amazon.co.uk/Craft-Writing-Poetry-Writers-Guides/dp/0749002891, http://www.poetrycan.co.uk/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=105&Itemid=83, http://carolinegillpoetry.blogspot.com, http://www.explorewriting.co.uk/PoetryCategory.html.

The podcast then culminated in News & Feedback, On This Day In History then…

Fiction Freebie

The last item of each weekly podcast is a piece of fiction – either flash or poetry and this week’s is an autobiographical poem I wrote about five years ago called ‘Three Quarters of a Whole’ which you can read in full on my website’s ‘What I do’ and blog’s ‘My writing’ pages.

And that was it for this week’s episode. Thank you for reading this page and especially if it then entices you to go and listen (and better still, subscribe). If you have any feedback or areas you’d like covered in the hints & tips podcasts, you can email me at morgen@morgenbailey.com or visit the website http://www.morgenbailey.com for the links mentioned in these podcasts, links to the blog, my two Twitter profiles and Facebook page, as well as other writing-related information. And I look forward to bringing you the next episode.

 

Today’s sentence starts

Here are today’s beginnings to do with as you wish:

1527. It seems to me as if… (first person)

1528. You know you’ll be banned… (second person)

1529. Eric had got away with it so far… (third person)

1530. Typing carefully on the keyboard… (you can use any pov)

1531. It drives me mad when… (first person)

1532. You tug and tug…  (second person)

1533. OK, so Geoff had lied on CV…  (third person)

1534. The light flicked on, then off… (you can use any pov)

1535. I flick through the paper… (first person)

1536. You smile as the icon appears… (second person)

1537. Lindsey hoped he was a ‘lights off’ man… (third person)

1538. The material was frayed at the edges… (you can use any pov)

Each set contains for different points of view so if you are weaker at one than the others, you may like to try these first. One of my favourites is the second-person point of view which is rarely used and not particularly commercially welcomed. It’s where the narrator is talking to the reader (you) rather than talking about him / herself and I’d recommend anyone who’s not tried it before to do so. It may take a bit of getting used to but hopefully it’ll grow on you as much as it did me.  You can read more starts here.